Categories : Parenting
By working, you can make your life better for your family – whether it comes in the form of extra income, fulfilling your personal goals, or being a positive role model for your children. Although finances are many times the motivation, not all working moms go to work because they need to provide for their family. If finances weren’t a concern, would you want to work to feel accomplished in your own life? Your career helps you define your identity. Here are some common concerns for the working mother:
Working can provide you and your child with a very gratifying life. While you are growing intellectually in your career, your child has the opportunity to learn as well. Childcare comes in many forms – from nannies to daycares to helping hands within your family. The important thing is not the type of childcare, but rather the quality. A nanny is another person who adores and loves your children. A quality daycare will teach your child cognitive and social skills. Children who start daycare early on are said to have an easier time in school and social groups.
Time with mommy isn’t always what your kids are most worried about. Believe it or not, they focus a lot on your happiness. They don’t see it as if you are taking time away from them, but rather taking time to help them. If you are stressed out and tired from working, they will take notice. Their first instinct won’t be to wish they had more time with you, but rather wish you had a better atmosphere at work, or more time in the day. Talk positively about your career with your children to keep the right mindset present.
The sad truth is you will never have more time in your day. You can only schedule your day in a way that best allocates your and your family’s time. If you’re feeling guilty for not spending enough time with your child, it may be reasonable to push their bedtime back an hour. If you feel that you are not spending enough time with your partner, block out a time every week devoted to him.
Stay-At-Home moms don’t just do nothing all day. They make sacrifices in other areas of life to take care of their families. If you can afford it, you may find that staying at home reduces your stress level and provides you and your baby the best life you can give. Here are some common worries among the Stay-At-Home mom:
When it’s just you and baby, it can feel a little lonely at times. Dad is at work, friends are busy…but most of all – you are busy! Your day is filled with feeding, cleaning, running errands and much more. You can begin to lose touch with the people you do know, and on top of that, it can be hard to meet new faces. Isn’t there supposed to be a support system of other stay-at-home moms waiting to have play dates? This is not always the case. To stay in the loop, just pick up your phone. Send a quick email or text. Stop by your old office on the way home from the store and let people say hi to you and the baby. Call up the mom you met in yoga class. Visit family. Face to face communication is very important during this time in your life.
If you set out to have a family and a career, you may begin to feel as though you have missed out on a life opportunity. When you are unhappy, it becomes harder to make your child happy and you can lose a motivation and drive for daily activities. If you feel there is more in life than staying at home with baby, consider what you could do to improve this. How do you want your children to remember you? Do you want them to cherish the mommy-and-me memories at home? Or be proud of their driven, working mother? Can you get involved in volunteer or charity work? Or maybe take a part-time job?
First ask yourself, are you at home by choice or by necessity? If you can make it on one income and you would like to be home, you may find that it reduces your stress level. Also keep in mind, running a household is a full time job and it should be honored as one. You have one of the most important (and full time) jobs of all – being a mom! Another important factor to remember - childcare is expensive! Add your second, third or fourth kid and the prices just go up from there. Will it be more expensive to pay for childcare than it is to stay at home with the kids?
When deciding your path between working mom or stay-at-home mom, remember: it is always okay to change your mind. Your kids are happy when you are happy.